A self-study course to help men in good recovery develop empathy and emotional intimacy for rebuilding relationships damaged by their sex addiction and infidelity.

Celebrating sobriety milestones but your marriage still suffers?

The one person left out of recovery is the same person harmed most of all—your partner.

Men often don't emphasize relational repair in recovery. Their lack of empathy and shame resilience makes emotional engagement challenging.

This self-study course teaches those skills so he can repair the harm and help her heal.

Is she apprehensive of your progress?

Men who struggle lack emotional intimacy.

Healthy relationships were not taught or modeled in their formative years, and they grew into adulthood lacking the ability to manage strong emotions in themselves and others. When partners witness little change on an emotional level—even in a sober recovery—they remain apprehensive of his progress.
Do your talks end in conflict?

Sobriety is not enough!

Recovery is more than abstinence

Sex addiction is an intimacy deficiency. Addressing this relational aspect is essential for long-term sobriety. For a spouse, relational repair is needed as an amends for her betrayal trauma healing, and for safety and trust to be re-established.

How to build empathy

Help Her Heal by Carol Juergensen Sheets

Help.Her.Heal© is a workbook for healing broken relationships damaged by sexual addiction and other forms of infidelity.  With a focus on empathy—understanding what the betrayed partner is feeling—its exercises guide men in rebuilding lost trust and safety.

Our DEEP STUDY course augments the educational material in the workbook with instructional videos for each chapter, along with additional resources and activities to help men learn emotional intimacy, better manage conflict, and move toward a more attuned relationship.

Students work on the course and workbook concurrently.

Learn how...

  • your addiction has harmed her
  • to carry the burden of her pain
  • to be a reservoir for her emotions
  • to communicate with empathy
  • to manage conflict and her triggers
  • ...to do all this without getting triggered yourself


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Do you still struggle?

We help men quit porn and sex addiction.

How to quit

Course curriculum

    1. 1.1 Start here

    2. 1.2 Task 1: Empathy vs Sympathy

    3. 1.3 Instructor Video

    4. 1.4 Workbook

    5. 1.5 Task 2: Courage of vulnerability

    6. 1.6 Task 3: Awareness for healing

    7. 1.7 Task 4: Self-regulation

    8. 1.8 Task 5: Regulating emotions

    9. 1.9 Journal

    10. 1.10 Partner Activity

    11. 1.11 Check Your Knowledge

    12. 1.12 Summary

    1. 2.1 Instructor Video

    2. 2.2 Workbook

    3. 2.3 Task 1: Origins of addiction

    4. 2.4 Task 2: Requisite for compassion

    5. 2.5 Task 3: Shame resiliency

    6. 2.6 Task 4: Polyvagal perspective

    7. 2.7 Task 5: Grounding

    8. 2.8 Task 6: Character strengths

    9. 2.9 Partner Activity

    10. 2.10 Check Your Knowledge

    11. 2.11 Summary

    1. 3.1 Task 1: Science of partner betrayal

    2. 3.2 Task 2: Betrayal trauma

    3. 3.3 Instructor Video

    4. 3.4 Workbook

    5. 3.5 Partner Activity

    6. 3.6 Task 3: Backwards bike

    7. 3.7 Task 4: Implicit memory

    8. 3.8 Journal

    9. 3.9 Task 5: Parasympathetic dominance

    10. 3.10 Task 6: Smiling Mind

    11. 3.11 Task 7: Mindful neuroscience

    12. 3.12 Check Your Knowledge

    13. 3.13 Summary

    1. 4.1 Workbook

    2. 4.2 Instructor Video

    3. 4.3 Partner Activity

    4. 4.4 Task 1: Mental fitness

    5. 4.5 Task 2: Neuroplasticity

    6. 4.6 Journal

    7. 4.7 Task 3: Relational conflict

    8. 4.8 Task 4: Fight-Flight-Freeze-Fawn

    9. 4.9 Task 5: Affect regulation

    10. 4.10 Check Your Knowledge

    11. 4.11 Summary

    1. 5.1 Instructor Video

    2. 5.2 Task 1: Trigger sheet

    3. 5.3 Task 2: Day starter/closer

    4. 5.4 Workbook

    5. 5.5 Partner Activity

    6. 5.6 Task 3: Affirmation share

    7. 5.7 Task 4: R.A.I.N.

    8. 5.8 Task 5: Emotional temperature

    9. 5.9 Task 6: Wheel of Awareness

    10. 5.10 Check Your Knowledge

    11. 5.11 Summary

    1. 6.1 Partner Activity #1

    2. 6.2 Workbook

    3. 6.3 Instructor Video

    4. 6.4 Task 1: Still Face Experiment

    5. 6.5 Task 2: Attachment 1

    6. 6.6 Task 3: Attachment 2

    7. 6.7 Partner Activity #2

    8. 6.8 Check Your Knowledge

    9. 6.9 Summary

Help.Her.Heal©
DEEP STUDY

  • $294.00
  • Compare to in-person groups at 2x the cost.
  • Help.Her.Heal© workbook sold separately.

What's included

  • Self-paced curriculum

    8.5 hours of instructor-led videos for the workbook chapters, plus 14+ hours of referenced audio and video material for additional studies.

  • Topics beyond the workbook

    Trigger causation/response, affect regulation, betrayal trauma science, shame resilience, relational recovery, and so much more.

  • Extended access

    Course remains open for 1 year from the enrollment date.

  • Money back guarantee

    If you are unsatisfied, contact us within 30 days of purchase to receive a full refund.

  • Student support

    A self-study doesn't mean you have to do this course alone. Get assistance when you need it by scheduling online support sessions with the instructor.

  • Partner support

    A free online Q&A session with our betrayal trauma recovery coach for your partner to gain course insights, expectations, and facilitate your growth.

Requirements

  • Exclusively for men who are change-ready and desire to heal the relationship.

  • Men who have been sexually sober (abstinent from acting out behaviors) at least 3 consecutive months in the past year.

  • This course is most beneficial when his partner is willing to participate. Her participation is highly encouraged, but not required.

  • Men who are people pleasers should meet with the instructor before starting the course.

  • Stay committed to a consistent study schedule.

  • Purchase the Help.Her.Heal© workbook separately. Order the paperback from Amazon.

Your Instructor

Got questions? Send him a message

Tony B levi ns

Addiction Recovery Coach

Tony and his wife founded their practice to help men regain their sexual integrity from the throes of active addiction, and help their partners heal from betrayal trauma. He has a special interest in the relational aspect of recovery—an often overlooked component to healing from compulsive behavioral disorders.

Testimonials

“The Help.Her.Heal class dissected the combination of betrayal trauma and sex addiction in a way that took a very complicated issue and made it understandable. Any previous study of betrayal trauma often just made me feel more shame (a big negative for an addict) and hopeless. While my relationship still has a long way to go to fully heal, Tony and this class have given me a solid footing for working on it, and for the first time in a while, I have hope.”

JP, Kansas City

“I had started working on the Help.Her.Heal workbook twice before signing up for Tony’s study of the workbook. Tony, his personal experience in the matter, and his unique approach to the workbook along with the tools that he taught, were instrumental in getting me to start to learn how to have empathy for my wife. Tony went beyond the basics of the workbook, and got into practical tools that I could implement with my wife to help heal our relationship. Thank you Tony!”

Paul C, Canada

“I had been attending recovery meetings for sexual addiction for 2 months, when the opportunity to attend Help.Her.Heal online classes became available. This course helped me remove the blinders. It became obvious to me that I didn’t even know how to express my feelings. Also, I didn’t understand my wife’s feelings.  My wife told me she could see a big improvement of my overall ability to connect with her and keep us on the road to recovery.”

Danny P, Birmingham

Start today.

An irony of betrayal, the one person who created her pain is the same person she needs to help her heal.
You can do this.
We can show you how.

Enroll in Help.Her.Heal© DEEP STUDY